Considering what Christ, the Holy One, has forgiven us for, we have no right to hold anything against another.
I wish I could apply this to everyone in my life. I have come a long way tho. I have let go of a lot. But there are a few things I just cannot get over and for some reason it involves family/extended family. Why is easier for me to forgive those not related to me? The only thing I can think of is the saying “You can choose your friends but not your family”
I know that I have to answer for my reluctance to forgive. I know in my head what I have to do. I just can’t get my heart to line up. I hope to be able to get there one day. I really do.
Well I knew it was bound to happen. I ran into my aunt at Wal-Mart yesterday. Let’s just say it didn’t go well. This aunt is the mother of my cousin Maureen who sadly has no life and would read my blog 5 times a day or more. Once I asked her to stop doing so her crazy husband called me up and started harassing me. He was calling me names such as trailer trash (uh yeah I live in a house dummy) and made a nasty remark about my 2 miscarriages even though his wife went through the same thing! Who does that?? Who would say something about a loss like that?? So when I get back from the store I get a call from my mom. My aunt had “tattled” on me to my mom 🙄 this is exactly the reason why I want nothing to do with the extended family!!! I can only imagine what Maureen and my aunt are saying about me now. These are the two biggest gossips of the family too. Hopefully if I run into “family” again they will keep on going. I know I will! 😉
Sigh…I am pretty annoyed right now. I just had a family member take me off their FaceBook friend list!! And it really is AHHHHHH!!! What started out as something not too big (at least for me) has snowballed into something big. Yes I said some things I shouldn’t have and she was apparently looking for an apology. She also was going to enlighten me as to why I seem to have problems with my family. Well I know why I have problems with my family. I wear my heart on my sleeve and I speak without thinking. It gets me into trouble more often then not. I also have a hard time saying that I was wrong. But guess what? This family member has made a point of pulling away from the family just as much as me. So the pot is calling the kettle black?? The only reason I’m blogging so freely about this because she commented on my last blog and said some things that I just couldn’t have public. I don’t want my blog to be about anyone other then me. And if someone reads it and is thinking I’m talking about them then I don’t know what to tell you. I blog about my personal feelings and my life. Yes if something a person has done has affected me I will blog about it. But I will NOT say Oh Jane Doe did this awful thing and she makes me mad. I will respect the other person’s privacy and only blog about MY side and how I feel (which is neither right nor wrong!!) I woke up after my hubby letting me sleep in to this and more from this person. And I don’t know what if anything she is saying about me. Yes I’ll admit I’m nervous she’ll talk about me. We had some pretty intimate conversations. But if she does say things I said then I guess I learned a lesson here. She says she won’t but she has also talked about other people to me so how can I know??? Sigh…I really don’t know where to go from here?? Yes I probably should call and talk it out. But she was pretty p*issed and used some strong language in ALL CAPS. So I don’t think she’d want to talk with me any way?? Things will be awkward for a while I guess? PTL tonight is church! I need to unload my burdens on His alter!!! (gasp…that makes me a crazy person!!!)